“Courage” & the “8th Step”
« on: September 19, 2008, 04:15:26 AM » Quote Modify Remove

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Courage: I was not going to write this "letter" to our trusted servants, those that put their time and talent into our area newsletter. It was so much easier to just let someone else write in their postings on this month's topic, courage. Wow, what a HUGE word! For most people, it conjures up images of heroes, great and small; however, those of us in N.A. never have to look to history or outside of our fellowship to see courage in the everyday.
We pray for courage at every meeting: "God, grant me the COURAGE to accept the things I cannot change..." That implies that it takes courage to really "Let Go and Let God." In fact, our basic text mentions this very thing, this God / courage bond, several times in the first 103 pages. Look them up. In the text, 5 of the 9 references to courage listed in the index specifically mention prayer and faith along with "courage." There is no doubt that our Higher Power is the source of our most courageous act, the daily decision to face our lives on life's terms and not run or medicate our problems away. We cannot do this without the spiritual principle of courage. So, I kept hearing this word, over and over at the meetings I attended. I felt totally un-courageous by NOT writing. It takes courage to put yourself out there whether at a meeting, a social gathering or in a newsletter. Next time you are unsure of sharing, say a little prayer, ask for a little courage, and give it your all. An Addict, Gina

When i started writing my 8th step my list wasnt very long on whom I owed amends to. Then my sponsor started explaining things to me a little more and I started thinking, geeshhh what a bad thing for an addict to do:ohmy: figure that my list started getting longer. I realized all the people I had harmed.. Wow.. I knew I was on that list also.. But to actually in my time to go to these people and tell them at some point in our relationship if I had harmed you in anyway I apologize.. Its like what if they look at you and say did you say something bad about me?? When making amends you dont have to tell them what your making amends about, (Thank goodness) If they dont want to forgive you its okay.. So when Im ready to start making my amends, I need to tell my sponsor whom Im goin to make amends to and what for.. (thats just me) and then I'll continue on my journey one by one in my own time.. no hurry.. I've hurt so many people (also myself) in so many ways.. With this program and working these steps I've found the courage to start making amends to the people I've harmed.. Its so sad, but I cant turn back time. I have to go forward and do the next right thing for ME today and go down my spiritual path of Recovery. "More will be Revealed"

I was shown how to make a simple list:
persons name- relationship- nature of harm- defect responsible willing

When I get honest,and willing,it happens.
That small chart simplified things.I put everyone,
including myself and God,and answered those questions.

Oh my, I have just started my 8th step this last month. I knew who I needed to make amends to, or so I thought! As I have answered the questions I've found a whole bunch more people to add to my list. I began to feel angry with myself for doing so much damage to others while out there in the drug haze. Then I remembered, it wasn't ME it was the addict IN me that had done the damage. Now that I am clean, I have to undo what my addict has done over the years. I may not be able to make amends to some of them cause they are no longer here. Others, it would cause great harm to them and possibly be a danger to me. I will learn how to make these amends when the time comes in step 9. I have no fear doing this step. I know it has to be done to help me move forward in my recovery. My fear, is "how". I have the courage to do this today. My sponsor, the people on this site, and in the rooms have shown me that it can and will be done. My relationship with my Higher Power will also be a huge, huge, part of it. Thank you all for your ESH. Luf&hugs Miz Vicky